This week my phone died. Yes, my cellular device, a constant addiction. Distraction. My source of connection to the world killed. 5 times in 2 days. Memory erased, contacts destroyed. I would have all my friends send me their numbers just to have them lost again. I couldn't be happier.
I lost numbers, facebook, instagram, snap chat, all my photos. The only thing left is my ability to call/textfriends. E-mail, and my calendar. And yet, I feel this is the best thing that could happen to me.
With so much connection, I find myself overwhelmed. Always checking the latest message. In a group of physical people never present. This didn't just happen, it came on slowly, but now I'm addicted and circumstance has caused me to give up cold turkey, and I don't think I'll go back.
The first day of cell phone crash, I was talking with my friend who shared that social media can cause depression and suicidal ideation. Because we're constantly checking it to see if anyone messaged us and no one usually has, then it's like being in a group of people that are ignoring us (mind you this is from a friend, I haven't checked the validity). However, on top of that, I have noticed in myself the constant draw to be online, be with people, even though I could be with the people I'm with. It's an escape from society...and I use it to bandage my social anxiety. However, could it be that my vice, instead of helping me escape from one awkward social experience is just plunging me into another....?
Even on days when I am constantly recieving messages. Facebook, text from mom, instagram, snapchat, text from friend, answer all, e-mail check. Repeat. How often do I find myself so overwhelmed with the notifications demands of a devise that my heard begins to palpitate at exhilerating speeds and I must admit I'm anxious beyond belief. I can't compete to meet the demands.
Not to mention the numbers of numbers I don't ever even use. Who is that friend on facebook? I must know them from somewhere. That one time. Must have been a great time, but who are you? Same with my phone. Who is Jessica P? I know we were friends...right?
Is it really healthy to be hanging on to all these relationships? Trying to make them work. Fighting my way through? For me? I don't think so. Though facebook is a wonderful too. I use it to send my sister cute pictures and let my mom see my life in the cities. I can even coordinate group events with a single message. But do I need it all the time? I don't think so, so Adios.
And Rachel, I love your cat, but I've decided I shouldn't be escaping uncomfortable social situations by perusing all of the videos on snap chat. Finally instagram....I really don't think I need 10000 pictures of peoples food on my phone. So I'm letting go.
As for my contacts. I've been praying. Papa, in this season who are you wanting me to connect with, pour into. Who are my people. I think he's answering.The numbers I have and will have are meant to be for now. The ones I lost, I guess the season is over for now. Time to start pouring in where I am to the people I'm with. No more distractions.
I lost numbers, facebook, instagram, snap chat, all my photos. The only thing left is my ability to call/textfriends. E-mail, and my calendar. And yet, I feel this is the best thing that could happen to me.
With so much connection, I find myself overwhelmed. Always checking the latest message. In a group of physical people never present. This didn't just happen, it came on slowly, but now I'm addicted and circumstance has caused me to give up cold turkey, and I don't think I'll go back.
The first day of cell phone crash, I was talking with my friend who shared that social media can cause depression and suicidal ideation. Because we're constantly checking it to see if anyone messaged us and no one usually has, then it's like being in a group of people that are ignoring us (mind you this is from a friend, I haven't checked the validity). However, on top of that, I have noticed in myself the constant draw to be online, be with people, even though I could be with the people I'm with. It's an escape from society...and I use it to bandage my social anxiety. However, could it be that my vice, instead of helping me escape from one awkward social experience is just plunging me into another....?
Even on days when I am constantly recieving messages. Facebook, text from mom, instagram, snapchat, text from friend, answer all, e-mail check. Repeat. How often do I find myself so overwhelmed with the notifications demands of a devise that my heard begins to palpitate at exhilerating speeds and I must admit I'm anxious beyond belief. I can't compete to meet the demands.
Not to mention the numbers of numbers I don't ever even use. Who is that friend on facebook? I must know them from somewhere. That one time. Must have been a great time, but who are you? Same with my phone. Who is Jessica P? I know we were friends...right?
Is it really healthy to be hanging on to all these relationships? Trying to make them work. Fighting my way through? For me? I don't think so. Though facebook is a wonderful too. I use it to send my sister cute pictures and let my mom see my life in the cities. I can even coordinate group events with a single message. But do I need it all the time? I don't think so, so Adios.
And Rachel, I love your cat, but I've decided I shouldn't be escaping uncomfortable social situations by perusing all of the videos on snap chat. Finally instagram....I really don't think I need 10000 pictures of peoples food on my phone. So I'm letting go.
As for my contacts. I've been praying. Papa, in this season who are you wanting me to connect with, pour into. Who are my people. I think he's answering.The numbers I have and will have are meant to be for now. The ones I lost, I guess the season is over for now. Time to start pouring in where I am to the people I'm with. No more distractions.
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