Graduation Nerves

This is a picture of the pie I baked that will be used for celebrating
after the commencement ceremony on Friday!

Nostalgia has slowly been slither through my veins. The drip, drip, drop of the IV that infuses the memories, making my mind whirl with wonder and awe as I realize, it's done. I stop and breathe for a minute, fixated on the point. Finished? Finally? Finally finished. Four years of institutionalized endocrination, friends made for me, rubbing shoulder to shoulder with the same old faces class after class, day after day, year after year, until now. A slightly queasy feeling rolls into ball in my stomach, expanding and expanding as it feels with the emotions of all the yester-years unfolding together in a vast array of things used to be.

So now what? To say good by, a bitter-sweet. The sadness of kissing my friends on the cheek and bidding them a dieu, as they go off to live the exciting dreams they were destined for. A dream come true, and a melancholy melody indeed, as I am left with the tears falling down my face as they tear a piece of my heart away with each plane that takes off into the night sky. And what about my dreams, as I am left, sitting in the dark, looking for stars that would point the direction toward my North that the desires of my heart take form.  

However, no spot of light can poke through the blackened veil of my robe as I am enveloped in the here and now, waiting to hear the sound of a voice calling me, telling where to go, what to do, who to be. In an institutional bubble, where they claim they teach me to think, I find my skills of critical analysis are futile as I seek to ponder the future. Indeed I am lost, looking back, yet moving forward. Saying goodbye, and wondering, What now? I am graduating