Sunday, January 13, 2013

Joy of January Day 1: Coffee with Dad

So...No, I didn't exactly get a picture of my coffee from this morning, or my Dad. However, this is a picture I took this summer of my really awesome breakfast and really yummy coffee and I figured that a mildly irrelevant visual was better than no visual at all.

"Love is accepting someone for who they are, all they are, and not trying to change them, because every part of them is a gift from God."
This is a quote from my dad, taken from a conversation we had a couple weeks back. I asked him what his best relationship advice was. That's what he answered. Accept even what we view as unacceptable, because it is a gift from God. This must be on his mind, because our conversation today focused on the same premises, except outside of a romantic relationship, and more focused on the community of the church. 
Earlier this year, there was about a month where I could not keep a conversation to save my life. Anytime I would spend time with anyone from what I would like to call "white suburbia" I would inevidably say something inappropriate and ultimately make myself look like the social outcast I already felt I was. Shocked stares would glare me down and I became overwhelmed with a sense of shame. Then it struck me. If this, as a believer who has been in the church since birth, feel this amount of shame hanging out with these so-called Christians, what is the draw to go to church for the rough-background, single mom, living in the ghetto who can't say a sentence with out a swear word? I have the love of the Lord to pull me through these sticky feelings of shame, guilt, and embarassment so that I can tackle one awkward moment after another, but what about her. Is it any wonder that people turn and walk the other way when only condemnation seeps from the church? It's about time that the church lost this mentality of "you have to be like us for us to accept you." In the early monastic peariod of the church, monastaries were built as a refuge for the wonderer. They would take every lowly person that came to their doorstep in. They would give them a meal, a new pair of clothes, chate with them, invite them to participate, and as a result the stranger would be won for the Lord. What a novel idea that people change when they feel accepted most. 
At my summer job we had a term called mission and shadow. Your mission is what you feel you've been placed on this earth to do. Your shadow is what keeps you from that. I feel my mission is to unconditionally accept everyone in hopes that they may experience genuine love. My shadow is insecurity of my own flaws and inability to accept myself, which causes me to conform and lose myself. I often think this is the shadow of the church. 
We become so insecure about being able to please the Lord, that we make a list of rule and laws that ensure we're on the right path and anytime anyone that pushes that ideal comes into our lives, we condemn, not wanting to be swayed. 
I feel its about time we laid down our defenses and took up the arms of love and acceptance, look on ourselves we grace, and find our true selves in the love of the Lord, that we may extend his love to the world. 


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